Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Training our daughters to be mothers

I don't know about you but having daughters is so fun and hard and sweet and stressful and wonderful....and well, if you have daughters you know.  If you have KIDS, you know.

One thing I've instilled in my daughters, mostly through brainwashing, is how to be a mom.  Brainwashing may be too strong of a word.  You decide:

Mom, what's the best way to have a baby?

At home without a doctor.

Mom, what's the best way to feed a baby?

With the breast.

Mom, where should babies sleep?

In bed with their mommies, so you can breastfeed them.

Brainwashing?  Not really.

I'm kidding people, kidding.

They've seen these things and have learned them from me doing them.

They've learned to care for their siblings and thereby have a great start at knowing how to mother.

These days Kati helps with Jerusha ANY chance she gets.  She LOVES babies.  Usually at rest time I will leave her in the living room to play with Jerusha while I lay down with Asa, to help him go to sleep.  She had the privilege of putting her to sleep one afternoon.

Should have seen her!  She was beaming all afternoon.  She had that precious feeling of putting a baby to sleep.  It's an amazing feeling as a mom. She got to feel that.  She wants to put her to sleep every day now.  She asks me every day if she can.  She just rocked in her the chair. 
Yesterday I put the sling on her and let her walk around with that. See?  More brainwashing.  It's subtle people.  Subtle.  She wanted to do it again today.  Wearing your baby is delightful and she got to experience that.

Kori babysits for us about once a week, for a few hours.  Again, this is training her. She learns how to organize her time and play with the children while at the same time being in charge.  This is something that she really enjoys.  As odd as it sounds she always gives them baths. They LOVE it and so does she.  I know it's odd.  True, though.

And Millicent, only four, is not too young to be indoctrinated, I mean, taught.  She nurses her babies and carries them in slings.  It's so amazing to watch her be sweet and cuddly with Jerusha.  She also makes sure that Asa is okay and has what he needs.  She encourages him and helps him during the day.

I'm training them now to be mothers. Someday I'll be looking into the faces of their children and I don't want to fail them.  You know?

What do you do to train your children, especially your daughters, to be moms?  Yeah, I guess you wouldn't be training your sons to be moms.  You could be training them to be fathers.  Or maybe not.  Maybe you aren't training them to be fathers.  But if you are, what are you doing?


Kelly said...

I don't have any daughters. I'm missing out on a whole world. BTW, where's your food list from yesterday missy??

Veronica said...

That is so sweet! My daughters are little helpers too and the smile they get with that beautiful sense of happiness and satisfaction when they help with their baby brother is such a blessing.

When they were younger and playing with baby dolls more they would nurse them too. It was always so adorable.

They are definitely getting indoctrinated, I mean taught ;)

Yara said...

My girls are the same way... helping with K all the time.
Aside from knowing all the best ways to care for a baby, my girls learn how to cook (my oldest is 7.5) and clean up & do laundry. Oh and they say "Babies prefer cloth diapers"
For the record, so does my younger sister who is single and in her early 20s ; )
Cloth diapers, breastfeeding, cosleeping & threats from me that when she has kids if she doesn't do it right... I will beat her. What?

Your Eldest said...

Way to not even mention me in that, Mom.

Twisted Cinderella said...

My two older daughters love to help and I love watching them play mommy to their dollies, imitating me in the things that they do.

Michelle said...

Right now my youngest is my only daughter, but my oldest is an amazing big brother. There is a large age gap so he can really help out. And often we don't even have to ask- he'll just pick them (boy/girl twins) up if one is upset or gotten hurt. Or if they just want to be held. They truly adore him and sometimes he's the only one that can make them smile. We tell him often how great he is and that one day he will be an awesome dad.