Friday, November 20, 2009

Giveaway Winner and my birthday


AH! It's the end of baby month. On a good note, it's my birthday. Which isn't as good as ending the baby month, as in I HAD the baby, but it's fun to get a year older.

Since it's my birthday I figure I deserve the earrings. I mean, what's the chance I would have my birthday on THE day I draw for the winner.

Okay, okay. That's not ethical. I'll draw a name.

BUT I did comment this week. So what if I draw my name? I get them right?

Okay, the winner is...ME! I drew my own name.

Okay, no, I didn't. I just completely lied to you. I just want these earrings. How lame is it to have a month of giveaways that I can't win. ON MY BIRTHDAY.

I'll draw a real name. Let me mosey on over to the random number generator.

Yep, it was me. Just kidding.

Really it was I'm Anitra. Be sure to check out her blog. It's really unique.

And thanks again to Aimee for the beautiful earrings. Be sure to visit her Etsy and her blog.

Now.....what should I do for my birthday? Post ten things I love about me, ten amazing pictures, ask the kids to tell me ten things they love about me? How about ten donuts. That's the ticket. Ten donuts.

See you after I'm stuffed!

Thursday, November 19, 2009

Writer's workshop-A new baby


Choose a prompt, post it on your blog, and go to Mama Kat to sign Mr. Linky. Be sure to sign up with the actual post URL and not just your basic blog URL (click on the title of your post for that URL). For good comment karma try to comment on the three blogs above your name!!

Remember that I have changed the prompts this week to reflect Baby Week. To see the original, visit Kat.

The Prompts:

1.) The first Thanksgiving with a new baby.

So far my babies have been almost a year old at Thanksgiving. This will be my THIRD baby, in a row, born in January. Or maybe I'll get lucky and it will be born in December.

2.)Describe the most destructive thing your baby has done.

Destroy my nipples with their iron sucking grip. (Can I say nipples on my blog?)

3.) Describe in 1000 words or less when you got pregnant and you knew that life would never be the same.

4.)Write a letter to your child for when they are 13.

I love you. Stop crying and being selfish. I'm just kidding. I wouldn't say that to them. But if you have a 13 year old you know it's true.

5.)Describe a moment you embarrassed your child.

I can't think of a single time. Can you Ashlea? I'm sure she can.

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Describe in 1000 words or less when you got pregnant and you knew that life would never be the same.

Telling Jeff when I get pregnant is a very fun and creative time for me. I do not want to just TELL him. I want it to be exciting for him. So I spend a lot of time during that trying to conceive period thinking of ways to tell him (and friends).

So when I got pregnant with Mill, after several months of trying, I was elated. AND frankly, I couldn't believe it. I had waited 14 years for another baby. Had tried for six months or so. Had taken numerous, numerous pregnancy tests, all negative. I couldn't trust this tiny little line.

I took a shower and prayed, asking God that if this was real, to please reveal that to me. And if it wasn't to let me down easy.

My sister had recently told me she was pregnant. It hurt so much. I had so many feelings about it. I wanted to be happy for her, but anyone who has been trying for a while knows, it's not always easy. Especially when someone else's circumstances aren't...well shall we say...hmmm...different than our own. (Was that tactful enough?)

I began planning and thinking and praying and planning and thinking and praying..and I was pretty much driving myself insane!

So I drove to the store and got another test and took it. I had to know FOR SURE.

Positive.

But even then I was still so surprised that I couldn't believe it. I have a group of girlfriends online (hey, ladies!) who are always supportive. So I snapped a picture of my pee stick (should buy stock in this stuff) and sent it to them...begging someone to see the tiny little line.

Oddly enough, I wasn't crazy. Okay, so yes, I was definitely obsessed, but not crazy. Because they told me they could see the line too. I started FREAKING. I was blown away. Pregnant? Pregnant? Pregnant? Pregnant? Yes, that was my thought pattern. That was all I could think about.

Children to me: Mom, can we have a snack?

Me in my mind: Pregnant?

Outwardly: Huh?

Children to me: Mom, can we play outside?

Me in my mind: Pregnant?

Outwardly: Huh?

You get me. It was all I could think about.

That night just happened to be our date night and it just happened to be the premiere of the last Star Wars movie. (Which is why Millicent would have been Obadiah had she been a boy...you get it? Obie.)

We ate at the mall at Chik Fil A. I stuck that nasty old pee stuck under some napkins while Jeff was getting our food from the front.

He sat down and didn't see it, and my heart was beating ninety thousand beats a second and at any moment I knew I would explode and start screaming...

I"M PREGNANT! I"M PREGNANT!

But I maintained. Finally he grabbed a napkin and out tumbled the stick.

Now, Jeff is seriously the smartest man I've ever met. He can remember anything you ask him to; he knows the answer to every question; he can learn something in minutes. He's smart, people. But when that stick came tumbling out his first thought was that someone forgot to clean the tables. He was grossed out. (And yes, he KNEW we were trying to conceive.) But then his senses came back to him....after like, oh, an eternity. He looked over at me and I was just smiling.

Finally he asked me and I said yes...and it was a good thing because I was about to BUST!!! Seriously lose a gut.

But still...we weren't sure. We took another! This time we got the pregnant, not pregnant, digital kind. (AFTER watching Star Wars, of course.) PREGNANT! And we finally rested and knew. Well I already knew.

As the months went by we wondered how our little family would change. How everyone would accept the new baby. Where and how it would come. Would we be able to adapt and be better parents. SO many thoughts.

Nothing could prepare us.

Millicent was born perfectly, and was perfect. What a joy she is to us. Our lives have changed infinitely and we are blessed because of her.






Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Getting through the first few weeks post partum


photo from home and dorm bedding

It seems the scariest time, after the birth itself, is figuring out how to survive those first few weeks. You may think that it would be limited to new moms only. But it's not. I often see on my due date list that mothers of two or three are asking for help on how to incorporate the new baby into their family. Today I have some tips. AND I hope you do too.

For me the old adage is true, sleep when the baby sleeps. The reason you even need sleep is because newborns are up a lot in the night. A LOT. Sometimes as often as every two hours. And whether you breastfeed or not, you are going to miss out on some sleep. LOTS of sleep for a LOT of weeks. If you have younger children, it gets a little trickier trying to get a nap in. But you can do it. You might want to start training your younger (soon to be older) children to lay down on mats NOW. Then when the new baby comes, you can send them wherever they will be mostly quiet, and have a little nap. I prefer to keep mine in eyeshot. But that may not work for everyone. If they are little-little, then you just take one long nap together in the afternoons. Even if your older little one isn't a napper. Trust me. You'll be exhausted. No matter how much help your husband is, you WILL be exhausted. If you can, invite someone over to watch the olders while you snuggle down with the new baby. Any good friend will help. (Hint, hint. Yes, it's very helpful to post it on your blog as a hint.)

Hold and love your baby as often as you want to, and can. IT FLIES BY. One day you are holding a weird looking wrinkly, red thing, the next thing you know, she/he is crawling and absolutely the most beautiful thing you've ever seen. THAT FAST. So enjoy it. Yes, you will be exhausted. You will have throw up in your hair. You will have not taken a bath since...since when? You can't even remember. Just hold and love that baby. Enjoy your time and don't worry about your hair, or that weird smell. OR CLEANING.

Which leads me to my next piece of survival advice. Don't worry about the cleaning. You are getting to know a new human being. You are probably a milk machine...just say Moo! You are leaking fluids...LOTS of fluids, some not so pretty. You are bigger than you've ever been. And you are exhausted because you got up 12 times to feed, change and make sure your baby was still alive. You don't have to worry about cleaning at this time in your life. Concentrate on taking care of yourself. YOUR BODY JUST GAVE BIRTH. An eight pound creature just came out of your...well you know where. And it doesn't matter EXACTLY where, because it still came out of YOU. And your body needs to recuperate. Get some friends to come help. (Hint, Hint, friends.) Ask husband to help out. Get the children to do anything they are capable of. But mostly, just don't stress about the condition of your house.

One question I hear a lot is how to make the new baby fit into the family without upsetting the other children. The key, I think, is making sure the other children feel apart of the pregnancy all along. Talk about the baby to them; talk about naming the baby with them; let them feel kicks and movements. Make them feel like the baby is theirs. We do not have ANY jealousy when a new baby comes home. Some people may want some extra cuddling or hugging. MAKE time for that when the baby sleeps. (Here a sling comes in handy.) Let the siblings hold the baby and help out. Just act like everything is normal without expecting any problems, and that is probably what you will get. Act like the siblings should be jealous, and that is what you'll get. It's a beautiful time. ENJOY it.

I would say my BIGGEST piece of advice for surviving those first few weeks is to breastfeed. I've done both. I have low milk. With Asa my milk ran out at two weeks and he began to lose weight rapidly. I had to do a combination of breastfeeding with the SNS and bottle feeding. I HATED bottle feeding. It is SO much work in comparison. You have enough work to do. (Ten diapers a day, plus several clothing changes???? YOU know they poop everywhere, right?) Breastfeeding can be a little tricky in the beginning. You can persevere. The KEY though, is to be fully and 100% devoted to breastfeeding. If you go into it thinking you'll try, you will most likely fail when you hit a bump in the road. And you inevitably will. Almost everyone does. Trust me on this. You will be glad you did. Instead of getting up and warming a bottle, you only need to get up and turn over...or if you don't co sleep, just get up. You can lay on the couch and go right back to sleep. Instead of a baby howling for five or more minutes while you prepare and ready the bottle, you have a nursing baby who is content and on their way back to dreamland. Which means, so are you!

Lastly, take a bath any time anyone comes over who can hold the baby. You'll feel better. The smell will go away. You can relax. Yes, hurry if you are worried about the baby (I KNOW I do). But do take one. And if you have it in you, take a long, hot, relaxing bath, knowing that whoever is holding the baby is doing fine. And if the baby wakes and starts to cry they will come to get you. Shave your legs even....that makes you feel really good. Or don't and buck the trend. Just enjoy yourself for a few minutes...fall asleep. Just be sure to be sitting up or we may never see you again.

I will close by telling you, you will be a zombie. But you will be amazed at how much love you have. If this is your first baby, no one can tell you the amount of love you will feel. And if this is your tenth, it's still surprising that you could love ANOTHER human being as much as you love your little bundle. You won't remember the last time you ate. You won't care that you have spit up all down your back and poop on your pants. (And oh yes, you WILL.) See, it passes so quickly that really it won't even matter. Just try to enjoy it.

I said I was closing but I have one more thing to say...

TAKE LOTS OF PICTURES.

WRITE EVERYTHING DOWN.

GET OUT THE VIDEO RECORDER.

YOU WILL NOT REMEMBER ANY OF IT.

(Okay, so that was more than one thing...but trust me anyway.)




Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Birth Stories


Yes, I KNOW I just used this picture but I don't have any baby pictures of the kiddos on this computer.

I love to watch the baby shows...ALL of them...even the very medicalized ones. Those remind me what I don't want:

Fifteen people who aren't invited, standing around watching
Being strapped to the bed
Epidurals and pain meds
Being offered epidurals and pain meds every time a doctor enters the room
Being checked, prodded and poked every 20 minutes
Internal exams
Breaking waters
Not being able to walk or bounce or rock or lean on a wall or rotate my hips
Having to follow someone else's orders instead of my intuition
Being forced to push to the count of 10
Not getting to be the first (second?) person to hold my baby
My baby being whisked away and cleaned up and clamped and shot up and gooped up
Not getting to enjoy those precious first moments after birth all alone with just my husband and family
Noise and lights
I could go on and on.

Every birth is a miracle. And some women really don't care how they birth their babies as long as their babies come. And I understand that. I really do.

At the same time, I want to know there are other people having medical intervention FREE births. Homebirths, UC's, even hospital births where they are left alone (is that real in this day and age????). I want to know woman can still do it...ON THEIR OWN.

So today I want birth stories.

If you have a birth story post it in on your blog and Mr. Linky back here. If you have previously typed up your birth story, link that post back. (Click on the title of your post, right click it in the address bar...that will be the EXACT address....and come back and put that in the address line of Mr. Linky.) I would really love to hear some UC's and homebirths but I'm not opposed to natural birth stories with as few interventions AS POSSIBLE at the hospital. And of course, Csections and horror stories are allowed too. This is for everyone. Just do us a favor and title your Linky...induced hospital birth, emergency csection, etc.

As I recognized earlier, all birth is a miracle. Your birth story is important to you, no matter how the baby came. Today I want to be encouraged that woman are giving birth the way they have for centuries...except for the going out to the field to pick cotton minutes after giving birth. I hope you don't do that.

If you have pictures, OH PLEASE, show pictures. A video and you will be my bestest friend forever.

And I just want to point out that I'm not saying that a natural birth is the only right way or that you are not a good mom because you had an epidural. I KNOW what birth feels like and it hurts! You have your baby however feels right to you! I'm for that 100%. I support you. Today I ask that you support me as I seek a different kind of birth...a natural birth with few interventions.

I'll still want to read your birth story. All of them!

Monday, November 16, 2009

Interview with: a VERY silly three year old


What do you think about having three older sisters? My big Ashlea, sister, I want to live with her, but she's way far away. And I can't go anywhere with her. Kati and Kori be mean to their little sister and little brother.

What do you think about being an older sister? I think I should still have mommy's milk because I'm an older sister. I think Asa should have Momma's milk.

What do you think the new baby will be? A boy, I mean, a girl. So when she grows up she'll be my sister.

What will you do with the new baby? Be mean to it, throw it on the floor, knock it off the crib. (She's joking.)

Will the new baby have mommy's milk? No. I mean, cold milk. Milk from the refrigerator.

Where will the baby sleep? In my bed.

What will the baby wear? Pajamas, all day and all night.

When will the baby be born? At Christmas.

Will the baby cry a lot or a little? a lot. I mean, a little.

Will Asa be nice to the baby? Yes.

Will you change the baby's diaper? Yes, all by myself.

What should we name the new baby? Apple Dumpling

What will the baby look like? A big soup.

I guess we are done here.

Friday, November 13, 2009

Giveaway Winner announced and new giveaway

AND the winner is: Brandee from Think Tank Momma

Don't forget Brandee...I'm pregnant. Hehehehe.

Be sure to visit Mary's etsy shop at Beautifully Created.

Now on to the next giveaway.



These beautiful earrings were donated by Aimee. She has some more wonderful pieces on her Etsy, so be sure to have a look.

Remember, each time you leave a comment, from now until next week, you will be entered in the giveaway.

If you have a giveaway on your blog, please let us know so we can enter. And don't hesitate to use this Baby Month to get rid of some regiftable items you've received by offering a giveaway...what better way?

Thursday, November 12, 2009

CHEAP photo stamps make great gifts

ShopAtHome Banner


Even though it's Baby Month, I still have to take the time to show you good deals, and I've got another for you. (If you missed my diaper deal from a few weeks ago, search the archives. They've actually gone down in price since then.)

Thanks to Money Saving Mom for this brilliant deal.

Click on the Shop at Home banner above. Register with them and they will immediately put $5 in your account.

Search for stamps. Click the photo stamps link. This will earn you $8 back.

Make your photo stamps. Be sure to order two sheets for the best deal.

When it's time to check out enter these codes, separately, in the promo code box:

thirtyoff
cutekid12 (for free shipping)

You'll get those stamps for a little less than $.40 each...which is cheaper than you can get stamps anywhere.

I made mine for the great grandparents. I've actually given regular stamps before with some cards and homemade address labels. Consumables are great for older people. I just hope they realize they can actually use these.

Here is the photo I used:

Writer's workshop--I am such a good mom, what can I say?

Choose a prompt, post it on your blog, and sign Mr. Linky. Be sure to sign up with the actual post URL and not just your basic blog URL (click on the title of your post for that URL). For good comment karma try to comment on the three blogs above your name!!

(Remember that my prompts have been changed to reflect my Baby Month theme. Please visit Mama's Losin' It for the original prompts.)

The Prompts:

1.) Describe the best/most creative punishment you have ever given your children or received yourself.

2.) Tell a friend or family members birth story, as if it happened to you.

I'm just not creative enough for this one...and frankly I don't remember many birth stories other than my own.

3.)
Tell a birth related story about a moment in time when you were so happy you were you and not someone else in the room.

Every time I see a woman get an epidural, I am grateful I'm not them. To me it seems to take more nerve to get a needle stuck in your back than to get in the bathtub and labor. YIKES! Makes my skin crawl just thinking about it. I HATE needles.

4.) When I was pregnant (or post natal) I went to the bathroom and I could not believe...

Oh boy! I could say so many things. I don't want to freak anyone out, so I'll just say, when I lost my mucus plug it was pretty hard to believe. And yet, totally exciting. I KNEW the baby would be coming soon...and I could start getting excited. When I saw bloody show I KNEW the birth was imminent and we could start really getting ready.

I'll leave out descriptions of those things...and many others, for another post. Don't worry, I wont leave you out in the cold on these things. I mean, come on, I shared how I wet my pants.

5.) Show us something from your pregnancy or birth.

This was mere minutes after Asa was born....gag...at the hospital...but we all still loved him anyway. Millicent's comment about her new brother: He's ooey! (He was still covered in blood since we didnt let anyone touch him the entire time we were there.)

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Describe the best/most creative punishment you have ever given your children or received yourself.

I am going to be open and honest and quite frank...mostly.

Do you ever feel like you are constantly on top of some of your kids: your breath stinks, fix your hair, your clothes are dirty, have you cleaned your room, your socks don't match, where is your school work, your chores aren't finished.

I know I have felt like that. A few weeks ago, God began to do a transformation in me. (To find out how bad pregnant brain is, ask me how long it took me to think of the word transformation...it ain't pretty.) He began showing me that my thoughts towards my children were lies from Satan. That he has given me ALL these children to raise up for Him. That yes, there may trials, but that I am suppose to walk through the trials victoriously.

I heard two wonderful sermons and spoke with a wonderful Godly mother that morning. She understood completely what I was feeling. She even offered some advice. When you have to tell that particular child (if you have one, you know what I mean by THAT child) eight times a day to leave something alone, begin to make a joke out it:

You silly girl. You know I wanted you to leave that alone...okay, now take it the kitchen and throw it away before I throw you in the trash.

I told her, yea, right. I will never be able to do that. I just can't. Children have to obey.

She told me she wasn't suggesting I overlook an offense, or ignore it. Just that it doesn't have to be always serious. That sometimes when I am disciplining I can make them laugh and take the pressure off both of us. I told her I would try. But in my heart I just didn't think I could do that. I was too frustrated too often.

Then I got home from church that morning and another Christian mom had sent an email about the very same thing I was struggling with.

She asked the same question I asked of you earlier. Don't you ever feel like some children are always on your radar?

YES I DO.

She said she committed to saying one nice thing for every time she had to get on to someone. This, I thought, I could do.

Even better, as I began praying and asking God to change MY HEART, not my children, he began showing me opportunities to be silly and just ENJOY disciplining my children. It became easier and easier to say....your clothes match so neatly today, but there is a little smutz on your shirt. Do you think you can find a cleaner one? ETC. ETC.

Instead of...OH MY GOODNESS! Can you see that your shirt is covered in spaghetti sauce???? (Can't they, though?)

So yea, there's all that. BUT this post isn't about what a great parent I am...though I AM.

This post is about...oh drats....what is this post about? (Prego brain again.) Oh right. A great punishment.

So the girls come out of the bathroom, having "gotten ready". And by that I mean, they went pee and evidently nothing else.

So as we are walking out the door I say, let me check your teeth. If your teeth are clean you can have dessert tonight. Immediately THAT child starts to run from the room telling me she needs to brush her teeth. Haha! Oh silly girl, you know it's too late now. Come let me check. Smiling and laughing the whole time.

And guess what? No one got dessert that night. And the girls' teeth were gross and stinky.

The next night we go to McDonalds and I check them again before they can have their cookies and soda. Cleaner, but not clean enough. (How does one get black on their teeth???)

But check this out, the next time we go to town, I have girls begging me to check their teeth. BEGGING!

They tell me they've brushed their teeth four times that day. And for many days later they are brushing and brushing.

Every time I check their teeth (well, mostly) they have been brushed and CLEANED.

And now, I don't nag anyone to brush their teeth and their teeth are cleaner than they have ever been.

Now, who has a solution for an open mouthed eater?????